Saturday, June 23, 2012

Self-Interview about Jean Hyde: Babysitter With A Club [work in progress]

In the criminal justice system, stupidly based interviews are considered especially heinous. In Backdoor Pilot Land, the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies are all watching a marathon of "My Mother the Car" at the moment and should be throw in jail. This is one of those interviews...

Andrew 1: I'm so glad you finally decided to start talking to me again so I could interview you about our comic book, Jean Hyde: Babysitter With A Club, for our blog.
Andrew 2: It's not a problem. When you handed me that baby muskrat I realized I just had put up with you for the sake of Jean. She's the world's greatest talking dinosaur.
Andrew 1: Not really… and I didn't give you a baby muskrat.


Andrew 2: Then where did it come from?

The BABY MUSKRAT points at ANDREW 1.

Baby Muskrat: ATTACK!!!

The BABY MUSKRAT jumps onto ANDREW 1's face biting him.

Andrew 1: Kill it with fire and send it back to hell!

2 hours later…

Andrew 1: So where did we get the idea for Jean Hyde: Babysitter With A Club?
Andrew 2: Your butt.
Andrew 1: Okay… now I want a serious answer.
Andrew 2: When I was watching the scene in Paranormal Activity 3 when SPOILER!!! the babysitter was scared by the demon wearing the sheet and then later when it farted in her face offscreen from that creepy little room and the babysitter left the kids there sleeping and didn't say anything when the parents got home and won the award for worst babysitter and pulled a "Halle Berry at the Razzies" by accepting it, I thought to myself, "What if a babysitter was prepared for the monster and smashed it to death with a hammer?"
Andrew 1: That last part about the award for worst babysitter never happened.
Andrew 2: I'll show you!

ANDREW 2 tackles ANDREW 1 to the ground and bites his face off.

Later in the hospital after multiple emergency surgeries…

Andrew 2: They attached your face back pretty good.
Andrew 1: Pretty well.
Andrew 2: You bastard!
Andrew 1: So why did we decide to write our "What If" idea as a comic book?
Andrew 2: Well after I consulted my mentor, Felicity Knightshade--
Andrew 1: Felicia Day…
 Andrew 2: No! We're both wrong. My mentor is Rooney Mara as Nancy Thompson in the A Nightmare on Elm Street remake.

[to be continued... or was it?]

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